50 Rules to Live by: Top 5

Jan 11, 2014 by Nick Kazos

5.  Seek trusting mentorship

From a personal perspective, this could just as easily have been my first rule.  You’re not as smart as you think you are – the moment you realize that, the better off you will be.  There is no shame seeking a trustworthy voice to help you along the way, and in turn, if you can offer that same service to someone else you should reciprocate.  There are people who are more experienced and knowledgeable in your discipline or can offer a unique perspective on your career path, relationships and difficult decisions in general.  They can help you take your life to another level of thinking; without their help you’re left to your own narrow perspective of the world.  They are hard to find, if you have to hire somebody, they are worth the investment.

4. Have (some damn) purpose

This might be the hardest rule for many of you.  If you don’t have purpose, discontinue reading this blog, stop everything else and go figure it out. Without purpose there’s no point in doing anything.  You’re just a slave otherwise. One day you will wake up in your 40’s and say what the hell did I do with my life? Sure it’s important to have a job and good relationships and all the great things we all want, but if you’re just killing time for a good salary or for maintaining falsities, or for some soul sucking endeavor, you’re just hurting yourself in the long run.  Time doesn’t discriminate; it consumes us all at the same pace. So why not use your time doing what suits your personality?  Define yourself and what you stand for.  You don’t have to do a job that makes a lot of money; you just have to do something that gives you a sense of fulfilment and purpose.  It’s something that gets you excited to wake up to every morning.  Depending on your age and station in life it might be very difficult to change, but is the alternative preferable? Don’t be a drone – figure things out before it’s too late.

3. Say less, act more

Promises, promises… I’m going to learn how to play guitar, start a business and ride a unicorn, while working 50 hours a week in a full-time job as a ballet instructor.

Despite how many times I say something I intend to do, it means nothing until I actually put the wheels in motion. You lose your credibility the more frequently you utter your intentions without actually doing them.  Say little in general, it will serve you best in the long run (I say this after writing 50 rules and 10,000 + words – I don’t think I will speak for a month!).

2. Take care of yourself first

In order to comply with rule number one, or any rule for that matter, you must first take care of yourself.  This might come as a shock to you, but very few people actually do this.  How many people do you know who are overworked, under-slept, overstressed, overweight, out of shape, lonely, unfulfilled, depressed etc? A lot right?

What makes matters worse is that very few people in your life actually care about you. When I’ve been at my lowest points in life very few stepped up and tried to be a light or a supportive figure.  I’m not special in that regard, I see it all around me every day in the lives of acquaintances and coworkers.  Most people only care about how they would like to use you to suit their lifestyle, which usually just magnifies the problem. Very few are those who are going to try to do the hard thing and genuinely try to be there for you – actually keeping your best interests at heart.  With that in mind, you can control who you CHOOSE to spend your time with, how you nourish your body, how to educate yourself, where you go to work, what skills to improve, how you demand others to treat you, how you respect yourself.  These are things you can control.  You must aim to physically, intellectually, and emotionally build your own armor.  If you’re house isn’t in order you will always be at the mercy of your peers. Their intentions are not always good for you.  You can’t make anyone else feel happy if you can’t look in the mirror and be proud of what you see. Take care of yourself first!

1. Do the right thing

Or at least try. Sometimes it’s hard to do. Sometimes you don’t know how. Some people bring out the worst in you and you can never do right by them.  Its ok, you’re not going to make everyone happy, focus your energy on those who appreciate and champion you.  Your attitude will go a long way towards doing the right thing.  You can bring something to the table every day that most people will not ever bother consider doing.

Bring levity to your company frequently.  Smile.  Be generous.  Kill them with kindness. Hold the door.  Make her dinner. Call to just to say hi. Don’t forget what matters.  Forgive, but hold accountable. Be accountable.  Be present.  Nourish yourself and your environment.  Don’t be complacent.  Let go.  Eat well.  Be mindful.  Be grateful. Look forward. Make your mother proud.  Fight for what matters.  Focus on the positive.  Help a friend.  Concede a moment. Challenge yourself.  Challenge her.  Rid yourself of envy. Rid yourself of barriers.  Learn.  Fight fear. Open your mind. Stay strong.  Share. Dance. Sing.  Listen more than you speak. Eat peanut butter cups.  Remember the little things. Allow for change.  Laugh.  Tell her you love her. Be good.